One down! :D Quite relieved that it's over actually, although I didn't want it to end.
Less stress now, I hope!
Something's wrong with my keyboard. Shouldn't type much. It's getting painful.
Oh wait it's okay now! It's just a program that was running just now.
All the best for 200m girls! (: And long jump! Jiayou!!
I'm so glad that I've got you, always there for me, being so supportive. MUARCKS!!
<3 (:
xoxo
31 March 2010
25 March 2010
23 March 2010
I want to eat carrot until I turn orange!
Tried Long jump today. (: A bit scary, but quite fun la. (: Thank Joshua and Wei Quan for the patience to teach me! Need Gabe. :/
So tired. Want to sleep. But want to wake up at 12 to wish Marilyn happy birthday. (: Hope bestie gets a hint and message my love soon! :D
An love don't worry he won't think of you as irritating one. You're so cute! :D
Get chased away already. I've only been here for like 5, 10 minutes. Thursday got Sparks, Friday got H3 test, Saturday Sunday most likely will have long jump training, Monday Bio block test, Wednesday selection test. DEAD. Hahas. Must enjoy tomorrow man go eat Swensen's! :D Eat until fat then cannot jump!
<3 you (:
So tired. Want to sleep. But want to wake up at 12 to wish Marilyn happy birthday. (: Hope bestie gets a hint and message my love soon! :D
An love don't worry he won't think of you as irritating one. You're so cute! :D
Get chased away already. I've only been here for like 5, 10 minutes. Thursday got Sparks, Friday got H3 test, Saturday Sunday most likely will have long jump training, Monday Bio block test, Wednesday selection test. DEAD. Hahas. Must enjoy tomorrow man go eat Swensen's! :D Eat until fat then cannot jump!
<3 you (:
22 March 2010
I need a plaster for my heart. But I'll be fine. (:
Shouldn't think about whether I DID the right thing.
Shouldn't think about what things COULD have been.
Just focus on now, and how to make things better.
Just can't seem to make myself get more sleep. Still sleeping late. This is bad... ): Can feel the effects, and their heartbreaks. Ouch.
Self-control! Self-discipline! Prioritise!
I don't really know how not to lean on my own understanding, or how to make decisions, because He's just telling me that He'll bless me in whatever I choose to do.
Or maybe that's what I need. It's not important what I choose to do, but how well I choose to do it and not think about not doing anything else. Hahas I'm confused, but thanks. (:
I hope I don't get injured in the next 2 weeks. That's the best that I can do. For now.
Oh no gtg! Hahas hope I still can come back. (: Yup I'll be fine.
Shouldn't think about what things COULD have been.
Just focus on now, and how to make things better.
Just can't seem to make myself get more sleep. Still sleeping late. This is bad... ): Can feel the effects, and their heartbreaks. Ouch.
Self-control! Self-discipline! Prioritise!
I don't really know how not to lean on my own understanding, or how to make decisions, because He's just telling me that He'll bless me in whatever I choose to do.
Or maybe that's what I need. It's not important what I choose to do, but how well I choose to do it and not think about not doing anything else. Hahas I'm confused, but thanks. (:
I hope I don't get injured in the next 2 weeks. That's the best that I can do. For now.
Oh no gtg! Hahas hope I still can come back. (: Yup I'll be fine.
18 March 2010
15 March 2010
Lose your emotional baggage
Yay! Meeting Mel tomorrow (: Quite stress about everything but never mind! Was super frustrated today when I read the message around noon and went out for a walk, but the word FAITH popped into my head, and very much calmed me down. Thank God! (: I think I just try my best la. Even if it's not enough. (:
I think I'm very distracted. The TV on then I will sit there and watch. NO SELF-DISCIPLINE! Aiya go sleep la. Super tired. Haiz. Jocelyn take care at camp! Have super a lot of fun. (:
K la I try to do a bit of work first. Then try to sleep early. Yup. (:
Love you!
I think I'm very distracted. The TV on then I will sit there and watch. NO SELF-DISCIPLINE! Aiya go sleep la. Super tired. Haiz. Jocelyn take care at camp! Have super a lot of fun. (:
K la I try to do a bit of work first. Then try to sleep early. Yup. (:
Love you!
12 March 2010
It's true that we shouldn't bury our feelings, but right now I need to.
Had some sort of spiritual attack/ emotional diarrhea just now on my way home. Almost went crazy. Feeling much better now but it can come again any time. And I have a feeling it will. Recorded my thoughts in my phone:
If it's possible, I also want.
It hit me so hard now it hurts so bad. I'm suffocating as the minute goes by. Hoping that something will happen, someone to save me out of this. But who can I blame, since I;m the one causing my own pain. Why am I inflicting pain on myself? I don't get what's going on. Something's terribly wrong. In fact, everything's wrong. Nothing feels right. I'm too dependent. I need to speak up and rely on Him more. Believe that everything's for my best interest (because it's true). I just can't figure out the feeling though. It's like I'm lost. ): And I can't even bring myself to listen to happy songs now. Because I simply feel too sad. Feeling so insecure that I can't stop peeling the skin on my thumb every time my hands are free. How I wish I have an eye candy that can cheer me up whenever I spot him from afar. One that I don't have to feel associated to, one that don't know my existence. Feel so confused feel so bad. Tomorrow got race I better rest well. Can't stand the feeling that I'm dying to hear something every moment. Or getting motivated to run faster because I didn't put in my 100% in the first place. But everything's going to end soon. So soon that I'm still in the shock that I;n going to do long jump. I love Lift You High by Planetshakers. I need to have that knid of love and mindset. Need to slap myself so as to wake up from the sweet dream before it turns to sweet. Or else I'll find myself crying when I wake up, when I finally realise that everything is not possible. Quick, wake up, before it's too late.
I felt like rubbish, but someone slapped me out of it.
See, verbal diarrhea right. It was like a 10 page long SMS. Just that at that time I didn't say all these out loud. It was inside my head, so loud.
I'm going to fail my psycho test man, at this rate. Need to tell my baobeis about it. (:
I think I'm giving myself too much stress because I'm too slack. Must push myself more. I feel very tired these days, although I'm not doing much. I feel so old. Oh man.
It was really scary. Dark and filled with screams. GET OUT OF MY HEAD!
I'm going crazy. All because of you, myself. Thanks ah.
Felt better after I reached home. Shouldn't have stayed back. Should be more independent. Anyway I've more or less decided to give up since I really cannot make it and focus more on what I can get. Maybe I should be more like the Benjamin I met today. Then I won't live until I feel so tired.
Mr Yip is crazy la. Ask me to go back to school tomorrow to ask him questions. He'll be very disappointed if he knows that I've secretly decided to give up, but he also admitted that even that Benjamin is better than me at concepts. I no hope already la. Sorry. (:
Can't laugh anymore. Anything that come out from my mouth now is either crap, or crap. Sorry baobeis. ):
This is so sweet. It's on a Facebook page It's like I want you to know, but I don't want to tell you:
here's a secret: I LOVE YOU ♥
So super sweet. :3
Must stop myself from imagining stupid things. Or hallucinating. I told ou I'm going crazy.
I really like this picture from It's like I want you to know, but I don't want to tell you. It corresponds to one of my notes in my phone that I displayed for quite a while. (:
I'll still love you. (: I'll try to put down the hate, even those for myself.
If it's possible, I also want.
It hit me so hard now it hurts so bad. I'm suffocating as the minute goes by. Hoping that something will happen, someone to save me out of this. But who can I blame, since I;m the one causing my own pain. Why am I inflicting pain on myself? I don't get what's going on. Something's terribly wrong. In fact, everything's wrong. Nothing feels right. I'm too dependent. I need to speak up and rely on Him more. Believe that everything's for my best interest (because it's true). I just can't figure out the feeling though. It's like I'm lost. ): And I can't even bring myself to listen to happy songs now. Because I simply feel too sad. Feeling so insecure that I can't stop peeling the skin on my thumb every time my hands are free. How I wish I have an eye candy that can cheer me up whenever I spot him from afar. One that I don't have to feel associated to, one that don't know my existence. Feel so confused feel so bad. Tomorrow got race I better rest well. Can't stand the feeling that I'm dying to hear something every moment. Or getting motivated to run faster because I didn't put in my 100% in the first place. But everything's going to end soon. So soon that I'm still in the shock that I;n going to do long jump. I love Lift You High by Planetshakers. I need to have that knid of love and mindset. Need to slap myself so as to wake up from the sweet dream before it turns to sweet. Or else I'll find myself crying when I wake up, when I finally realise that everything is not possible. Quick, wake up, before it's too late.
I felt like rubbish, but someone slapped me out of it.
See, verbal diarrhea right. It was like a 10 page long SMS. Just that at that time I didn't say all these out loud. It was inside my head, so loud.
I'm going to fail my psycho test man, at this rate. Need to tell my baobeis about it. (:
I think I'm giving myself too much stress because I'm too slack. Must push myself more. I feel very tired these days, although I'm not doing much. I feel so old. Oh man.
It was really scary. Dark and filled with screams. GET OUT OF MY HEAD!
I'm going crazy. All because of you, myself. Thanks ah.
Felt better after I reached home. Shouldn't have stayed back. Should be more independent. Anyway I've more or less decided to give up since I really cannot make it and focus more on what I can get. Maybe I should be more like the Benjamin I met today. Then I won't live until I feel so tired.
Mr Yip is crazy la. Ask me to go back to school tomorrow to ask him questions. He'll be very disappointed if he knows that I've secretly decided to give up, but he also admitted that even that Benjamin is better than me at concepts. I no hope already la. Sorry. (:
Can't laugh anymore. Anything that come out from my mouth now is either crap, or crap. Sorry baobeis. ):
This is so sweet. It's on a Facebook page It's like I want you to know, but I don't want to tell you:
here's a secret: I LOVE YOU ♥
So super sweet. :3
Must stop myself from imagining stupid things. Or hallucinating. I told ou I'm going crazy.
I really like this picture from It's like I want you to know, but I don't want to tell you. It corresponds to one of my notes in my phone that I displayed for quite a while. (:
It's so super duper sweet la~ LOVE YOU! :3
Ok I should go and rest soon. Race at 2.40 tomorrow. Weather: Dunno. Feeling: Scared. Jiayou! :3
You can do it! (:I'll still love you. (: I'll try to put down the hate, even those for myself.
08 March 2010
Things that cheer me up :D
This is some announcement I found under a folder on KM called A Level Examination. And it's damn funny!
Important!
by Tan Cheu Yian 11/20/2009 9:45 AM
It's super cute can! Especially the third point. LOL.
And I learnt a new word last Friday! It's "Quorine"! :D
I think he still doesn't trust me as much.. Hmm... Hahas never mind la I don't care about all those politics. Go for it, electrophoresis! You can do it!
Oh my gosh! Cannot stop laughing after reading these feedbacks. This is damn funny:
This Just Has To Be Said
Some may find this a waste of space. If my brain wasn't dead from Mathematics, I would probably be sane enough to agree.
But some things must be said and apologised for as a matter of principle.
...Sorry Mrs Poon, I wasn't paying attention to what I was typing, and I know you're not Mr Tan.
Sincerely,
-Bern
Another one:
Sorry sorry.
Sorry Mrs. Poon, I really thought you were a man.
My bad.
.wen loong
HAHAHA! They are damn cute. It's damn random and although I don't get what they mean, but it's really very funny. Thanks for brightening up my day. :D
Important!
by Tan Cheu Yian 11/20/2009 9:45 AM
- Please bring a jacket along for the examination which you could wear it if you feel cold.
- Please bring an umbrella in case it rains.
- In the event of floods, please do be reminded that your safety is of the utmost importance. Contact the College immediately if you do have problems reaching the College on time.
It's super cute can! Especially the third point. LOL.
And I learnt a new word last Friday! It's "Quorine"! :D
I think he still doesn't trust me as much.. Hmm... Hahas never mind la I don't care about all those politics. Go for it, electrophoresis! You can do it!
Oh my gosh! Cannot stop laughing after reading these feedbacks. This is damn funny:
This Just Has To Be Said
Some may find this a waste of space. If my brain wasn't dead from Mathematics, I would probably be sane enough to agree.
But some things must be said and apologised for as a matter of principle.
...Sorry Mrs Poon, I wasn't paying attention to what I was typing, and I know you're not Mr Tan.
Sincerely,
-Bern
Another one:
Sorry sorry.
Sorry Mrs. Poon, I really thought you were a man.
My bad.
.wen loong
HAHAHA! They are damn cute. It's damn random and although I don't get what they mean, but it's really very funny. Thanks for brightening up my day. :D
If it were to be any different, I won't like it as much.
I don't want to think about all the if's and maybe's. I'm happy the way things are. Even though there may be sad times or tough times, I still like it right here, right now. I'm not going to regret any decisions I've made, any path that I walk, for God placed me in all this and I trust that that's the best for me. (: Like giving me more time to rest because I haven't been taking care of myself. I know it breaks His heart, as well as my mum's, to see me sick and uncomfortable when I don't take time to rest and get sick in the end. So, I'll try to sleep earlier from now on! I'll try really... Whether I get 7As or not for A levels is completely irrelevant if I can't even do my A levels because I get too sick. Jus chill and take things light. It's not like I'm completely stupid or lazy, so I'm sure I can do it. (: I'll be smiling with my baobeis around this time next year, or maybe crying tears of joy because I love the drama (hahas).
I don't care what things will turn out to be. What's done is done. I don't care how you think of me. I'm going to throw you away! :D OK at least I'll try. Hahas I'm going crazy. Yup I'll try my best. By that time, be proud of me OK? (:
I don't care what things will turn out to be. What's done is done. I don't care how you think of me. I'm going to throw you away! :D OK at least I'll try. Hahas I'm going crazy. Yup I'll try my best. By that time, be proud of me OK? (:
05 March 2010
It's ok to be completely random
Don't stop believing
Hold on to that feeling
Streetlight people
A level results are out. Guess now's the time where a lot of people are scratching there heads hard trying to figure out where to go from here. I hope I won't be one of them this time next year.
People scream. People cry. I stood there to enjoy the drama. Feeling kind of numb and kind of affected as well. Hope these people make the best of what they have and don't regret from now on. I'll need a BIG hug next year too, from everyone I see man. Hahas. Hope PW will be ok. All the best 09! (:
Everyone can turn their back against me, but I just need you to believe me. It's the source of my strength. Hope this holds true for long enough.
Don't stop believing in what you can do. There's someone up there always smiling at you, having faith in you more than you yourself do, knowing that there's a great plan for you. Jiayou slow gang! Next year we go up to the stage together! (:
I need to rest. Reserve for SPH relays tomorrow and Sunday. No time to do work at all. I'm physically drained as well. Dying already... xP
All the sad songs make me so sad... ): Must change my preference to Madhu's favourite song. LOL!
虽然无所谓写在脸上
我还是舍不得让你离开
虽然闭着眼 假装听不到
你对爱已不再想依赖
I feel blue 沒有風的下午
想起那天還是會有點辛苦
Oh so blue 恨自己太清楚（生命不能重複）
我有花在眼前 酒在喉間 想的是你的笑臉
如果能在雨天 會不會有改變
也許你就永遠在我身邊
如果當時瞭解 看見我的曖昧
你會不會體貼地再多留一會兒
Come back again
是誰走錯了一步 誰又能不後悔
只是 痛心的 失心的 狠心的 再難挽回
如果能再遇見 會不會有改變
也許你就永遠在我身邊
如果當時瞭解 看見我的曖昧
你會不會體貼地再多留一會兒
Come back again
愛可以這樣 當我想一個人晚餐
卻碰到你坐在對面
剛分手的人 已有新伴侶
為何我還在意
你已屬於她 而我只能看著窗外
有沒有人比我可憐
所以愛上別人包括忘記你 需要一點時間
哦 陽光竟然耀眼
哦 隨便
想你已經十天又三天
我好想再看你一眼
一路 轉彎 直線 曲折又熟練
是你回家的路線
分手已經十天又三天
整個人什麼都不對
左邊 右邊 心裡 尋找了幾遍
你真的不在身邊
愛已經這樣 而我付過帳的咖啡
苦得沒有一點甜味
當然也有人約我好多遍
但我沒有感覺
你已不存在 或是還有那麼一點
陰陰暗暗不肯離開
所以愛上別人包括忘記你
需要一點時間
哦 陽光竟然耀眼
哦 想念
想你已經十天又三天
我好想再看你一眼
一路 轉彎 直線 曲折又熟練
是你回家的路線
分手已經十天又三天
整個人什麼都不對
左邊 右邊 心裡 尋找了幾遍
你真的不在身邊
All so sad right. Lol. Haiz.
Hold on to that feeling
Streetlight people
A level results are out. Guess now's the time where a lot of people are scratching there heads hard trying to figure out where to go from here. I hope I won't be one of them this time next year.
People scream. People cry. I stood there to enjoy the drama. Feeling kind of numb and kind of affected as well. Hope these people make the best of what they have and don't regret from now on. I'll need a BIG hug next year too, from everyone I see man. Hahas. Hope PW will be ok. All the best 09! (:
Everyone can turn their back against me, but I just need you to believe me. It's the source of my strength. Hope this holds true for long enough.
Don't stop believing in what you can do. There's someone up there always smiling at you, having faith in you more than you yourself do, knowing that there's a great plan for you. Jiayou slow gang! Next year we go up to the stage together! (:
I need to rest. Reserve for SPH relays tomorrow and Sunday. No time to do work at all. I'm physically drained as well. Dying already... xP
All the sad songs make me so sad... ): Must change my preference to Madhu's favourite song. LOL!
虽然无所谓写在脸上
我还是舍不得让你离开
虽然闭着眼 假装听不到
你对爱已不再想依赖
I feel blue 沒有風的下午
想起那天還是會有點辛苦
Oh so blue 恨自己太清楚（生命不能重複）
我有花在眼前 酒在喉間 想的是你的笑臉
如果能在雨天 會不會有改變
也許你就永遠在我身邊
如果當時瞭解 看見我的曖昧
你會不會體貼地再多留一會兒
Come back again
是誰走錯了一步 誰又能不後悔
只是 痛心的 失心的 狠心的 再難挽回
如果能再遇見 會不會有改變
也許你就永遠在我身邊
如果當時瞭解 看見我的曖昧
你會不會體貼地再多留一會兒
Come back again
愛可以這樣 當我想一個人晚餐
卻碰到你坐在對面
剛分手的人 已有新伴侶
為何我還在意
你已屬於她 而我只能看著窗外
有沒有人比我可憐
所以愛上別人包括忘記你 需要一點時間
哦 陽光竟然耀眼
哦 隨便
想你已經十天又三天
我好想再看你一眼
一路 轉彎 直線 曲折又熟練
是你回家的路線
分手已經十天又三天
整個人什麼都不對
左邊 右邊 心裡 尋找了幾遍
你真的不在身邊
愛已經這樣 而我付過帳的咖啡
苦得沒有一點甜味
當然也有人約我好多遍
但我沒有感覺
你已不存在 或是還有那麼一點
陰陰暗暗不肯離開
所以愛上別人包括忘記你
需要一點時間
哦 陽光竟然耀眼
哦 想念
想你已經十天又三天
我好想再看你一眼
一路 轉彎 直線 曲折又熟練
是你回家的路線
分手已經十天又三天
整個人什麼都不對
左邊 右邊 心裡 尋找了幾遍
你真的不在身邊
All so sad right. Lol. Haiz.
03 March 2010
Make happiness a habit. (:
I also don't want my schedule to be like that. Don't have time for anything these days. Haiz...
Things will get alot better after March. Because things are ending. Hang in there in the mean time dear! (:
Listen to happy songs, think of happy thoughts, and just be positive! Gotta write my script!
Better catch up on GP reading article. Gonna get slaughtered...
Thank God for all that have happened in my life. And all that have not. Really.
Maximise my capacity! (: Get more sleep. Be less lame. ): Hahas.
Make smiling a habit. Make love a habit. See no evil. Hear no evil. Be no evil.
Be more cute. Hehe. :3
And be myself. (: Sleep more......
Make better use of time. Don't be so blur and everything.
Should have used those hands to play piano. Haiz. Lol.
Stop being random! (: Write script! Study for maths test! Do GP homework! Make time if I can't find time. (:
Don't let me go
Don't let me go
Don't let me go~
That's the most boring chorus hahas. Whole thing x3 some more.
Thank you my beloved baobeis. For staying through with me all this while. (: Don't know what to do without you all.
<333
Things will get alot better after March. Because things are ending. Hang in there in the mean time dear! (:
Listen to happy songs, think of happy thoughts, and just be positive! Gotta write my script!
Better catch up on GP reading article. Gonna get slaughtered...
Thank God for all that have happened in my life. And all that have not. Really.
Maximise my capacity! (: Get more sleep. Be less lame. ): Hahas.
Make smiling a habit. Make love a habit. See no evil. Hear no evil. Be no evil.
Be more cute. Hehe. :3
And be myself. (: Sleep more......
Make better use of time. Don't be so blur and everything.
Should have used those hands to play piano. Haiz. Lol.
Stop being random! (: Write script! Study for maths test! Do GP homework! Make time if I can't find time. (:
Don't let me go
Don't let me go
Don't let me go~
That's the most boring chorus hahas. Whole thing x3 some more.
Thank you my beloved baobeis. For staying through with me all this while. (: Don't know what to do without you all.
<333
01 March 2010
Smile Smile Smile (:
Pull yourself together! Gather all lost strength and the broken pieces of motivation, and stand up once more. Charge towards your goal! (:
Sometimes I don't know if it's you or if it's just me. I've drifted a bit too far.
I think I can go to church next week! (: If all goes well.
Hope dad has a safe trip. Nothing will happen to him. (:
Yup keep smiling girl. Cry when you need to because it releases toxics and depressants. Hahas.
Away from me, you stomach-ache-causing germs. SHOO.
Hahas. I think I'm a bit siao liao. But thanks dear for being there for me. (: And I've got a new poem for my honey! I think she'll faint hahas. Or get flu because it's too cold. :P
Snap out of impractical thoughts and lie in a whole bunch of beautiful dreams! Just don't cry when it gets too beautiful. <3
Can't you feel this magic in the air? It must have been the way you kissed me. Right on the forehead. (:
'Cos only your fingers can fit perfectly into the space between my fingers.
Hehe.
Better run. Daddy's coming back. :D
Sometimes I don't know if it's you or if it's just me. I've drifted a bit too far.
I think I can go to church next week! (: If all goes well.
Hope dad has a safe trip. Nothing will happen to him. (:
Yup keep smiling girl. Cry when you need to because it releases toxics and depressants. Hahas.
Away from me, you stomach-ache-causing germs. SHOO.
Hahas. I think I'm a bit siao liao. But thanks dear for being there for me. (: And I've got a new poem for my honey! I think she'll faint hahas. Or get flu because it's too cold. :P
Snap out of impractical thoughts and lie in a whole bunch of beautiful dreams! Just don't cry when it gets too beautiful. <3
Can't you feel this magic in the air? It must have been the way you kissed me. Right on the forehead. (:
'Cos only your fingers can fit perfectly into the space between my fingers.
Hehe.
Better run. Daddy's coming back. :D
21 February 2010
I was initially so sad. Thought I'd miss the chance. My dad told me never mind, there will always be chance, but I wasn't convinced. After reading the email more closely, I thought it wouldn't be very useful to me anyways, since I'm not the thinking and speaking up type of person, but I still felt that the chance would be wasted if I can't go.
Just so stubborn. Myself.
In the end I decided to complain about it. Lol. Though I thought I really shouldn't. Should have drawn the line sooner.
After that I was glad that there may actually be a chance that I can go this tea party, although not very likely that RIJC and HCI will have it on the exact same day, nor asking the professor to change the day for the training. But at least he tried. And I'm happy.
I tried.
Didn't go for the extra training at Bishan stadium yesterday morning. Although it's beneficial for me. Wasn't feeling very well and so didn't feel like going. Hasn't been feeling well since 2 Wednesdays ago. Really tired and worn out and stressed. I feel that I'm wasting everyone's time anyway, but He told me not to give up. I'm only wasting everyone's time if I keep being so lazy and negative. Must try to make better use of my time without compromising on my beauty sleep. I was almost late on Friday, really thank God I wasn't. I don't know how the school bell got even slower than my watch, but it mustn't have happened by chance. Therefore I must grab every likely opportunity that God has placed in front of me and make full use of it. And be more dependent on Him and not anyone else, especially not myself. I am weak but He is strong! Can't be so proud and complacent anymore. He loves me so much.
Everything that He has done for me, to take me so far. I'll embrace it with much love too.
"Hope you love it! (:"
Yes I want to. And I can if I just even try.
Mustn't listen to sad music. It really affects my mood a lot.
Last thing to mention... sorry Erin that I didn't go for Starstruck! ): Was really tired by that time though I tried staying back... Hope everything went well. (:
What else can you say. You hypocrite.
The silence isn't so bad
Till I look at my hands and feel sad
Cos the spaces between my fingers are right where yours fit perfectly
Yay cheese tofu! Love it! (:
But I've grown soooooo fat over the Chinese New Year period. ):
Stop eating, you fat pig! Nationals' in about 1 month's time!! :0
Cos I see your blue eyes every time I close mine
You make it hard to breathe.
Just so stubborn. Myself.
In the end I decided to complain about it. Lol. Though I thought I really shouldn't. Should have drawn the line sooner.
After that I was glad that there may actually be a chance that I can go this tea party, although not very likely that RIJC and HCI will have it on the exact same day, nor asking the professor to change the day for the training. But at least he tried. And I'm happy.
I tried.
Didn't go for the extra training at Bishan stadium yesterday morning. Although it's beneficial for me. Wasn't feeling very well and so didn't feel like going. Hasn't been feeling well since 2 Wednesdays ago. Really tired and worn out and stressed. I feel that I'm wasting everyone's time anyway, but He told me not to give up. I'm only wasting everyone's time if I keep being so lazy and negative. Must try to make better use of my time without compromising on my beauty sleep. I was almost late on Friday, really thank God I wasn't. I don't know how the school bell got even slower than my watch, but it mustn't have happened by chance. Therefore I must grab every likely opportunity that God has placed in front of me and make full use of it. And be more dependent on Him and not anyone else, especially not myself. I am weak but He is strong! Can't be so proud and complacent anymore. He loves me so much.
Everything that He has done for me, to take me so far. I'll embrace it with much love too.
"Hope you love it! (:"
Yes I want to. And I can if I just even try.
Mustn't listen to sad music. It really affects my mood a lot.
Last thing to mention... sorry Erin that I didn't go for Starstruck! ): Was really tired by that time though I tried staying back... Hope everything went well. (:
What else can you say. You hypocrite.
The silence isn't so bad
Till I look at my hands and feel sad
Cos the spaces between my fingers are right where yours fit perfectly
Yay cheese tofu! Love it! (:
But I've grown soooooo fat over the Chinese New Year period. ):
Stop eating, you fat pig! Nationals' in about 1 month's time!! :0
Cos I see your blue eyes every time I close mine
You make it hard to breathe.
10 February 2010
I WISH YOU WERE A STRANGER I CAN DISENGAGE
Madhu!! Get well soon!!! (: Drink lots of water and keep sleeping till you get sick of it! :D If not don't come back, even though we miss you... Take care and recover! (: LOVE YOU LOTS! <3
Now I must really stay away from the computer. Cannot touch it at all. If not I won't move from my seat.
Aiya Friday how ah... Cannot go back XMS, cannot go eat ice-cream... What to do... zzzzzzzzzzzzzz
Need the whole holiday to study. Can't do vectors, didn't do respiration tutorial, not very sure about econs, and need to finish whacking the whole of Smith ASAP. Can't believe I took the wrong bus today took me so long to get home. ): I'm so tired...
Jiayou girl! Don't be deterred by the obstacles but keep fighting! (: You can do it! I have all the right plans for you so don't worry! :D
So chim. To us we don't need any prove to believe it, because it's already so natural. But if we do find evidence, it will help other people to start to have faith too. (: Although it's like the wrong way, because we shouldn't only believe upon sight.
Need to push myself. Need a little hug as well. Aww.
Don't just leave me hanging on. I need to make time for you, as well as myself.
Now I must really stay away from the computer. Cannot touch it at all. If not I won't move from my seat.
Aiya Friday how ah... Cannot go back XMS, cannot go eat ice-cream... What to do... zzzzzzzzzzzzzz
Need the whole holiday to study. Can't do vectors, didn't do respiration tutorial, not very sure about econs, and need to finish whacking the whole of Smith ASAP. Can't believe I took the wrong bus today took me so long to get home. ): I'm so tired...
Jiayou girl! Don't be deterred by the obstacles but keep fighting! (: You can do it! I have all the right plans for you so don't worry! :D
So chim. To us we don't need any prove to believe it, because it's already so natural. But if we do find evidence, it will help other people to start to have faith too. (: Although it's like the wrong way, because we shouldn't only believe upon sight.
Need to push myself. Need a little hug as well. Aww.
Don't just leave me hanging on. I need to make time for you, as well as myself.
09 February 2010
Holidays coming! :D
Warning to everyone (esp myself): Don't eat too much! For people who are weight conscious, you'll become fat. For me, I'll become off-season and become unable to run. ): Oh man.
Tomorrow I have the external lesson with all the smart people again! Very hard to not stress, but I guess I'll try... (Ya, I'll try) Haiz... Hope I can understand tomorrow's lesson and don't embarrass myself in front of everyone. This time round cannot be late. >:(
This innocence is brilliant
I hope that it will stay
This moment is perfect
Please don't go away
I need you now
And I'll hold on to it
Don't you let it pass you by
Get out right now
Get out of my head.
I need to get some sleep back.
Hopefully I don't eat and sleep throughout the whole chinese new year period. Hard to say.
So why can't I turn off the radio? Actually I can, just unwilling to? Or is it lazy? Aiya idk la. Hahas.
Btw bestie jiayou!! :D Lol. Sorry to say but the prospects don't look that great... We'll see. (:
Tomorrow I have the external lesson with all the smart people again! Very hard to not stress, but I guess I'll try... (Ya, I'll try) Haiz... Hope I can understand tomorrow's lesson and don't embarrass myself in front of everyone. This time round cannot be late. >:(
This innocence is brilliant
I hope that it will stay
This moment is perfect
Please don't go away
I need you now
And I'll hold on to it
Don't you let it pass you by
Get out right now
Get out of my head.
I need to get some sleep back.
Hopefully I don't eat and sleep throughout the whole chinese new year period. Hard to say.
So why can't I turn off the radio? Actually I can, just unwilling to? Or is it lazy? Aiya idk la. Hahas.
Btw bestie jiayou!! :D Lol. Sorry to say but the prospects don't look that great... We'll see. (:
04 February 2010
Slow down. And the things that you're chasing will catch up with you. (:
Thank God for such great friends. Feel much better after getting it off my chest. Well sort of. And thanks a lot for Madhu's sweetness! (: I'm getting diabetes! But seriously, without all of your support and encouragement and willingness to listen, I won't make it this far today. (: Still quite confused and blur but better already. (:
Can't get it off my mind, even though I know that it's not real. WHY?? So irritating... ):
Sorry for talking so much about the topic so much all the time. You all must have been tolerating my crap for very long... ): From now on I'll try! But then I will be like super quite because my life is so empty. Since I cannot talk about homework and tutorials, I'll be super lame. Brace yourselves. Muahahas.
Saw Mr Yip today, going home after playing tennis with his "friend", and only ended the game because (I think) they got chased out by the tennis people (Hahas Yi Leen was complaining how he has been so irritating to the tennis people for snatching their court). Then after the game he just walk by himself without waiting for his "friend" la! So bad. Then I said bye to Wenman during my training, purposely ignoring him because more often than not he ignores me. Anyway I think tomorrow cannot eat pizza already la... William got PA duty and Jingwei has to rush off. Saded. ):
But the IChO training was really scary. All the people there are damn smart. ): I just kept praying that the name selector thing won't pick my name throughout the whole lesson. Like that how to learn properly? So stressful la. But thanks to Mr Ng being so nice and everything that I got over the stress a bit. But if I keep staying here in front of the computer to destress, I'll only get more stressed. Vicious cycle. Sigh. Mr Yip was still like not stress won't improve and all. Haiz. Don't know how la.
Anyways I suddenly realised that I still have to do some shopping for V day! Oh man. Can only pray for time. There will be, but I'm not sure if I can manage or use it properly.
Just 顺其自然 lor. Bleh. Love you my BAOBEIs!! <333
Can't get it off my mind, even though I know that it's not real. WHY?? So irritating... ):
Sorry for talking so much about the topic so much all the time. You all must have been tolerating my crap for very long... ): From now on I'll try! But then I will be like super quite because my life is so empty. Since I cannot talk about homework and tutorials, I'll be super lame. Brace yourselves. Muahahas.
Saw Mr Yip today, going home after playing tennis with his "friend", and only ended the game because (I think) they got chased out by the tennis people (Hahas Yi Leen was complaining how he has been so irritating to the tennis people for snatching their court). Then after the game he just walk by himself without waiting for his "friend" la! So bad. Then I said bye to Wenman during my training, purposely ignoring him because more often than not he ignores me. Anyway I think tomorrow cannot eat pizza already la... William got PA duty and Jingwei has to rush off. Saded. ):
But the IChO training was really scary. All the people there are damn smart. ): I just kept praying that the name selector thing won't pick my name throughout the whole lesson. Like that how to learn properly? So stressful la. But thanks to Mr Ng being so nice and everything that I got over the stress a bit. But if I keep staying here in front of the computer to destress, I'll only get more stressed. Vicious cycle. Sigh. Mr Yip was still like not stress won't improve and all. Haiz. Don't know how la.
Anyways I suddenly realised that I still have to do some shopping for V day! Oh man. Can only pray for time. There will be, but I'm not sure if I can manage or use it properly.
Just 顺其自然 lor. Bleh. Love you my BAOBEIs!! <333
03 February 2010
Know your limits, and then ignore them.
It's amazing how much God is still protecting me, eg. for my bio test today, He really helped me a lot in my revision because I only started revising last night at 11pm and slept at 2am without doing part 4 of my ICS at all. Yet today I was able to sort of answer the questions. Also, I was lucky enough not to get called to present my answer during IChO training today, because I still lack practice and really need to buck up before I can catch up with the rest. Thank God, because now I know my weaknesses more and that His strength can be proven by my weakness, and through this I'll find wisdom from Him. It's such I shame I haven't been relying on Him and communicating with Him as much these days, due to all the work piling on me and me having no time to do them, and started to have less faith in Him. Now that I'm aware of it, I don't know if I can regain that faith in Him and thus prove it by having more confidence in myself as well, but I guess I'll try. I'm very screwed up these days, and I don't know why. Need to be closer. Also need to trust more in His plan and His faith that He'll only put me somewhere because I'm more or less up to it, just like how He won't tempt us beyond what we can bear. I must not feel inferior or give myself too much stress. Really feel suffocated today. Hope tomorrow will be better. Need sleep...
Happy birthday Avery Gan! :D
Today was so embarrassing la. I think I didn't know how to do most of the questions and Mr Yip had to help me all the time. And all the HCI and RIJC and NUSHMS and TJC people can somehow handle everything on their own. Must give myself more training. Need a little push here.
Thank Mr Ng too for talking to me and giving me so many advice. (: But I think my free calls for this month now used up already thanks to that long talk. 13 more days to go without calling with my hp. Right.
Can't breathe really. Don't know how. Feel like asking Albert Einstein how 24 hours a day was enough for him. :/
KM broke down! :D Sorry for the randomness but I'm somewhat happy and a bit disappointed. Should celebrate. Hahas.
How to be creative without being lame? So deep and so difficult la. Even Mr Yip said the alkaline room in NJ question was not funny. Haiz. Maybe it's just that he doesn't know how to appreciate. :P
Wonder how the studying session went today for Celine, Rachel, Samuel and John. Productive? I'll ask Celine tomorrow. :D
OK la should stop blogging about random stuff. Need to buy NJ badge from the bookshop for my new "friend". Don't know how I'll ever fit in.
Heard those unfriendly comments again. Shall ignore them and brace myself for GP tomorrow. Every time like fighting war or somthing so tense. Even she says it's like a graveyard, since we don't even dare to breathe. God give me strength!
Super stressed and super confused. But life goes on, so just prepare myself for tomorrow! (:
<3 YOU.
Happy birthday Avery Gan! :D
Today was so embarrassing la. I think I didn't know how to do most of the questions and Mr Yip had to help me all the time. And all the HCI and RIJC and NUSHMS and TJC people can somehow handle everything on their own. Must give myself more training. Need a little push here.
Thank Mr Ng too for talking to me and giving me so many advice. (: But I think my free calls for this month now used up already thanks to that long talk. 13 more days to go without calling with my hp. Right.
Can't breathe really. Don't know how. Feel like asking Albert Einstein how 24 hours a day was enough for him. :/
KM broke down! :D Sorry for the randomness but I'm somewhat happy and a bit disappointed. Should celebrate. Hahas.
How to be creative without being lame? So deep and so difficult la. Even Mr Yip said the alkaline room in NJ question was not funny. Haiz. Maybe it's just that he doesn't know how to appreciate. :P
Wonder how the studying session went today for Celine, Rachel, Samuel and John. Productive? I'll ask Celine tomorrow. :D
OK la should stop blogging about random stuff. Need to buy NJ badge from the bookshop for my new "friend". Don't know how I'll ever fit in.
Heard those unfriendly comments again. Shall ignore them and brace myself for GP tomorrow. Every time like fighting war or somthing so tense. Even she says it's like a graveyard, since we don't even dare to breathe. God give me strength!
Super stressed and super confused. But life goes on, so just prepare myself for tomorrow! (:
<3 YOU.
27 January 2010
He has Good, Pleasant and Perfect Plans for Me. (:
Looking forward to this Saturday! (: See what I get and I'll inform my primary school and secondary school teachers about it! I hope they will be happy. :D
After having like so much good news in the first 2 weeks of school, I think I'm a bit used to it and was looking for 1 on Monday and Tuesday. My mum said that I'm a bit proud, but I think that I should keep working hard in, for example, tests and class and stuff so that I can honour God and be very aware that He is blessing me so much by counting my blessings (though I know that there's so much blessings that I won't be able to finish counting! :D), so that on every Saturday, I can worship Him and scream for Him like mad because I know that I've been living in victory for the week! (: Luckily, I found 2 for this week: the first being the training/trial from God to behave myself by having my mum set all the curfews and rules on me, and the punishment being not allowed to have pocket money for the week and not allowed to go to church for the week. This really trains me into having the mindset of doing everything to honour God, and not for my own pleasure or anything. (: The second one is that I topped the first H3 test! :D I was like super happy at first, but then when I thought about it, it would be very embarrassing if I don't take that spot. Don't be replace, just like what one of the sermons said, and since I think I'm capable enough, with God blessing me with so much, I'm sure I can maintain that spot if I keep working hard! (: I know that may sound a bit egoistic and proud and sad, but I'll do my best in my own way to honour Him.
Also, I checked out the website for IChO 2010 in Tokyo and found the schedule super nice. They've got excursion for the students almost every other day! Because anyway we will only be there to sit for 2 papers, but they gave us like 11 days to spend in Japan, so I was like from I'm really stressed... I don't know if I can be one of the 4 who make it there in July to I WANNA GO!!! IT'S SO COOL! xD
Hopefully it's healthy motivation to myself. (: And really thank God for Celine and her encouragement note! :D I LOVE YOU TO DEAR!! <333
Curfew at 11pm every night. Even on weekends. For sleeping/lights-off. A bit stressed and not used to it but I'll try. Need more skills to prioritise my tasks...
Critical thinking! Hope it will help me for my chem as well. :P
Alright I really should go. I think I'll only have time to go the GP articles and critiques on Sundays. I haven't done the one for last week so I have to do 2 this week. Note to self: Start revising for ICS SOON!!
I thank God for all that He has given me this week. (: I hope I remain humble and not become proud. I want to treasure my friends around me, and not just make friends with my chemistry textbooks and biology notes! D: Take care friends don't fall sick! (: Jiayou!
You give life a reason to breathe. 'Cos you're so awesome. <3
After having like so much good news in the first 2 weeks of school, I think I'm a bit used to it and was looking for 1 on Monday and Tuesday. My mum said that I'm a bit proud, but I think that I should keep working hard in, for example, tests and class and stuff so that I can honour God and be very aware that He is blessing me so much by counting my blessings (though I know that there's so much blessings that I won't be able to finish counting! :D), so that on every Saturday, I can worship Him and scream for Him like mad because I know that I've been living in victory for the week! (: Luckily, I found 2 for this week: the first being the training/trial from God to behave myself by having my mum set all the curfews and rules on me, and the punishment being not allowed to have pocket money for the week and not allowed to go to church for the week. This really trains me into having the mindset of doing everything to honour God, and not for my own pleasure or anything. (: The second one is that I topped the first H3 test! :D I was like super happy at first, but then when I thought about it, it would be very embarrassing if I don't take that spot. Don't be replace, just like what one of the sermons said, and since I think I'm capable enough, with God blessing me with so much, I'm sure I can maintain that spot if I keep working hard! (: I know that may sound a bit egoistic and proud and sad, but I'll do my best in my own way to honour Him.
Also, I checked out the website for IChO 2010 in Tokyo and found the schedule super nice. They've got excursion for the students almost every other day! Because anyway we will only be there to sit for 2 papers, but they gave us like 11 days to spend in Japan, so I was like from I'm really stressed... I don't know if I can be one of the 4 who make it there in July to I WANNA GO!!! IT'S SO COOL! xD
Hopefully it's healthy motivation to myself. (: And really thank God for Celine and her encouragement note! :D I LOVE YOU TO DEAR!! <333
Curfew at 11pm every night. Even on weekends. For sleeping/lights-off. A bit stressed and not used to it but I'll try. Need more skills to prioritise my tasks...
Critical thinking! Hope it will help me for my chem as well. :P
Alright I really should go. I think I'll only have time to go the GP articles and critiques on Sundays. I haven't done the one for last week so I have to do 2 this week. Note to self: Start revising for ICS SOON!!
I thank God for all that He has given me this week. (: I hope I remain humble and not become proud. I want to treasure my friends around me, and not just make friends with my chemistry textbooks and biology notes! D: Take care friends don't fall sick! (: Jiayou!
You give life a reason to breathe. 'Cos you're so awesome. <3
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